Monday, September 21, 2009

Who Are the People in Your Neighborhood?



Do you have "Everyday Friends"? You know, the people that you encounter in your daily routine that you sort of know, but you don't really know--like the UPS man, the pharmacist, or the chicky who pours your coffee at your morning stop. I can chat it up big time with these folks, sharing a laugh, or telling them a story, all without ever knowing their name.

I have lots of Everyday Friends. Maybe because I like to talk or perhaps I'm just friendly, I don't know. I just end up chatting it up with the likes of the check-out gal at Walmart and the manager dude at my local Hallmark store. I actually go to shop at these stores looking for my pallies, and I think they like it when I come in too.

I once had a pharmacist pally at the Target near my house. At the time, I was on prescription iron pills and pre-natal vitamins for the anemia I was battling. Whenever I would come to pick up the prescriptions, he would always ask me (jokingly) when was I "due" and would proceed to tell me how I "didn't show". He would wink, telling me it was all in fun, and I would make some wise-acre comment back each and every time I went there. He was sweet as pie and I would love to go get prescriptions because, well, he was a pally.

I actually cried real tears when I heard that he didn't make it through a routine surgery--I felt like I knew this guy even though I don't think I even knew his name. Try explaining that one to your family. I had lost an Everyday Friend.

My mailman had been with us for years, when one day he dropped the bomb on me that his route was being changed. Juan and I have chatted a lot over the years--well, you know as much as the mailman stops to chat.

Juan and I talked about his love of the hot weather and disdain for the cold. I would leave him a cold bottle of water on those super hot days and he would hunt out my mailbox around the yard when we had construction on the front of the house. He popped in to inspect the new family room after construction and I would tell him wacky stories of the people who replaced him while he was on his day off.

We compare cool vacation spots and he gives me updates on where he's going year after year. I live vicariously through Juan and his vacations. He's on this quest to see the United States, and I encourage him by giving him tips to the cool places we've been. I love to hear about his trips and I tease him year after year that I'm going with him. I think maybe Juan and I could kick butt on the Amazing Race. Could you see the post under our names on the screen--"Mail Carrier and Customer"? Geesh, it would be hilarious, wouldn't it? Imagine if we won.

Anywho. Juan gets his route changed last year and I'm bummed. New mail carrier is BORING--won't even say "hi" or anything. Imagine my delight when, months later, I was parked on the other side of the 'hood waiting for one of the kids and I see Juan delivering his mail.

"Juan!" I'm yelling out my car window and waving like a fool. I think I scared him.

"Hey!" he yells back. "I'm going to DC next week!" and I laugh.

Everyday friends. You can't beat 'em.

Just a few weeks ago, I spy Juan across the street--back in our 'hood. I stopped my bike and yell to him--I do a lot of yelling to Juan, apparently. He comes over and he tells me that he got his route back, the other dude retired.

"Yeah, he wouldn't say 'hi' to me, Juan. He was crabby." I report.

"That's what everyone is saying." he tells me. So, I guess my Everyday Friend is a lot of people's Everyday Friend. But that's okay, I'll share him.

So, life is back to normal now. Juan delivers my mail, I wave at him when he's getting the mail out of his truck a few blocks over, and we chat every now and then.

He's going to Niagra Falls and to Toronto next. I got the full report as Juan was delivering mail across the street. Yeah, this time he yelled to me.

35 comments:

Jo said...

If it were not for everyday friends, I would have no one to talk to but the diva!! LOL!

Casey said...

I love that you have so many everyday friends! Juan sounds like a keeper... I think your other mailman retired to FL and is doing my route. Crabby and not at all chatty.

I like everyday pallies, even if I don't know their names. It makes the day a little nicer to see a familiar friend.

Helene said...

My work has my everyday friends. I got the Fed Ex guy to be a tax client. My boss has yet to forgive me for that one.
Mail man would talk to me about divorce-I was kind of Dear Abby, tell me about the latest best movies to go see-Forgetting Sarah Marshall-he told me I'd like that one then when I watched it it was like watching his life after divorce, we're both from the same town and when Richard Simmons was at the local Walgreens we met up there and I tried to get him to go take his picture with him.
Restaurant owner next to work would make me pasticio (an entire pan) if I begged enough but they moved after rent issues. A bit further to new place.
I just got to know our mailman at home when he was transferred due to route changes.
I tried to avoid people at home but walking the dog and the kid introduced me to neighbors all over the place and even got me my sweetie who keeps saying "why didn't we meet 30 years ago??"

JStantonChandler said...

Everyday Friends. What a fun post :) I have the FedEx guy (who says the most awkward things!), the mail lady (very friendly and always wishes me a good day), the UPS man (who actually smiles), the barrista at Starbucks (whom, I hear, does a mean Yeti impersonation) and a clerk at Publix (recognizes us because of my husband's huge red beard!).

Hmmm, now that I've moved, I need to make some new Everyday Friends!

Jen

Pricilla said...

Most people stop here for the goats, not the publicist. *sigh*

Or the yurt. *sigh*

But that is rural life. The people are dull and ANYTHING out of the norm is what draws.

And two crazy Easterners moving to a riverfront lot plopping down with goats, chickens and a little round house is just plain odd.

We heard more times than we can count that folks expected us to put up a "trophy house" 'cause we were from the East. They thought we were rich.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!

JD at I Do Things said...

Oh, you're so lucky you got Juan back!

My beloved mailman, Arnold, was an Everyday Friend. I seriously loved that man. He was so friendly and so good at his job (yes, it's more than just plopping letters into boxes). One day he rang my bell to tell me he'd gotten promoted and would be working at the post office. I was so bummed. It's just not the same. Our new mailman is crabby and never says hi, either. In fact, he always has headphones on. Once I saw Arnold at the store and we both screamed and hugged.

I miss him.

Karen, author of "My Funny Dad, Harry" said...

I'm betting you are just a very friendly person to have so many every day friends. I used to have a couple RTA bus driver "everyday friends" but RTA is so whacky, they purposely change the drivers' routes so they DON'T become too friendly with the riders. It's too bad really. Glad you got your mailman back!

Merry said...

It drives my family crazy that I have "friends" in stores. I will search in their line and then chat away while they check out my items. I have been told many times "Don't start talking to everyone" when we go into a store. I guess I am a bit of a pain. That just makes me want to look for someone just to talk :)

Stacie's Madness said...

hahah. it's funny the people "you know" but don't know, I imagine we all have those types of everyday friends.

Grace said...

Yes,yes, yes to everyday friends. I have always been on very friendly terms with our UPS delivery person, we do almost all our shopping on-line. I have no idea who our mail person is but I'm a real chatty-kathy with every shopkeeper in the neighborhood, even my husband is catching on to the everyday friends aspect of life. It certainly does make every day chores a little better and brighter.

Lin said...

Jo--And why do you think I'm such good friends with the mailman and the UPS guy??! Hee! Hee! And we nicknamed the UPS guy the "Cute-PS guy" 'cuz he was soooo adorable!

Casey--I think it makes the boring day just a little more fun. My kids ask why I talk to everyone, but now I find Em doing it too. It just makes everything more fun. Sorry you got Mr. Crabbypants delivering your mail. :(

Helene--Neighbors--NO. I don't want to get chummy with them anymore, I got burned. But the come and go kinda pallies, well, yeah. I love how you and your mailman were "hanging out" to see Richard Simmons! Too funny!

Jen--And that's the beauty of it--they are EVERYWHERE! Happy new friend-making!

Pricilla--I would imagine the yurt would draw a lot of folks asking questions. I would stop and Joe would be dying in the car. He doesn't talk to everyone like I do. He's boring.

JD--Oh, that's so sad that Arnold left you! I missed Juan every single day when he was gone. You should have seen me yelling to him when I spied him on his new route! I think I freaked him out on that one! Sigh. Maybe someday you'll get a new FRIENDLY postman.

Karen--I heard the Catholic church does that too with it's pastors--don't let them get too friendly. Isn't that weird? I cannot imagine that being an actual policy for any business. Sad that you lost your good drivers.

Merry--I used to do that to my mom too and my kids do that to me. Except now Em realizes that it is fun and she joins in. My Hallmark dude just waits for the banter when we come in, I swear!

Stacie--And I know some of their names, but not all. I don't think I knew my pally pharmacist who died. But, I still think of him often. I hope I leave an impact on people like that. I doubt it though. ;)

Grace--You are right--it makes the chores a lot more fun. I like our Walmart because you wouldn't expect there to be much interaction with the employees, and they are GREAT! I have more fun yacking it up with the Walmart pallies.

Storm, The Psychotic Housewife said...

See? People are nicer elsewhere. No one stops to talk around here. People are almost always short.

Petula said...

I LOVED my mail carrier. Older gentleman, smoked a pipe and around forever. Rarely made mistakes. Everytime we had a "sub" I'd get the wrong mail or no mail or something else crazy, and then when I would see him he'd say, "Yea, everyone was saying that." Then he disappears! I think he retired. I am so hurt he didn't say goodbye. The new people suck.

I think I only have one other everyday friend. How sad. LOL... I'll come by your place so we can talk to Juan before we go on our adventure.

Your Daily Cute said...

This is a great post! So much fun. Except now I'm kind of bummed... I live in an apartment and we just have a bunch of boxes together, so I don't get to have a Juan. I'm missing out!

vanilla said...

Oh, yes, I have no-name friends with whom I chat regularly. At my age, or stage of life, most of my friends are nameless, even the ones I've known forever. What's that all about?

(If only I could quit racking my brain trying to remember.)

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

That is so me too. We've had some really great mail carriers that were like family and when one of them's route changed, I was ready to storm the post office and ask to have him back. Things just aren't the same.

Also, checkers at grocery stores, beauty supply places...before too long, you know to ask, "How's your grandson?" or "Did you move to your new house yet?"

The other day, my daughter had an hour conversation with her mailman.

Thank you for reminding me that every day people are really important parts of our lives.

Lola said...

Is it sad to say that my everyday pallies are 2 pharmacists at Target? First it was one, then she went on maternity leave, and another pharmacist began working more hours at our store and then she became an every day pally. Both of them know all about us and it's always a laugh when I come in because they ask whose rx I'm picking up and I never know! They commiserate with me when I'm picking up Anastasia's (and picking up the tab). They notice when I don't bring our daughter in and the times our daughter was in the hospital they always asked about her.

Sharkbytes (TM) said...

Nice to have those kinds of friends. I'm too crabby.

Jude said...

My best everyday friend was at the liquor store she knew my whole life history and we didn't even know each other, she was 72 and loved my scooter and cried when my son died. Amazing how close you can get to someone that really doesn't know you or you them.

Lin said...

Storm--I think you are gonna hafta spread some sugar all over that town! It begins with you, pally. Go be friendly to a cashier where you shop. Talk to the dry cleaner. Tease the gas station gal. There are friends to be had everywhere, Storm! Go forth and find them! Oh, and report back, okay??

Petula--I think Juan would want to go with us! He was all in when I told him I was going to New York City with him! I'm not sure Joe was as excited about me going--but it sounded like fun to me! Maybe we can meet some hobo pallies on our travels.

Cute--Oh, it doesn't have to be your mailman--didn't you watch the video?? It could be a teacher or your newspaper guy. It can be the cashier at the gas station or the Fed Ex guy at work. Everyday friends are everywhere--you just have to make the first move. Oh, you and Storm need some pushing!

Vanilla--The nice thing about forgetting is that you can't remember who drives you crazy and who you like! So, I guess you can be friendly over and over again. :) There are benefits to growing old, isn't there? LOL!

Chocolate--They are the gentle smiles that make the mundane and routine nice. It's important to have fun in this life, even if we are just picking up milk at the mini-mart.

Lola--Sounds like you've got a couple of winners there! How nice that they ask about your daughter. It's good to have some pallies that don't know every detail, but still smile and ask just the same. Love them.

Sharky--Oh, you are NOT! I'm crabby too sometimes and I just need to hunker down and avoid all forms of life. But then, there are those other days when I need to crack up with a complete stranger over something silly. Try it, Sharky--it can be fun!

Nancy said...

It does make those everyday boring tasks much more fun when you have someone to banter with. Also a great way to ensure good service and no need to get into a fight with them about this or that. I just got a new doctor and the receptionists are actually really cool. The enjoy a nice bout of sarcastic banter about what surgery you are about to get and when the ban-saw is all warmed up. It definitely, oddly enough, calms the nerves.

Thanks for the comment about the video thing not letting you see my post. Would you be able to tell me if you can see my new post when you happen to visit next? If not, I'll just take the video down then.

blueviolet said...

You would have fit in living in Mayberry. You're such a friendly and sweet person!

Lin said...

Nancy--Everything is fine at your place now. The cat video is super large and sort of covers the side bar a bit, but the new posts and subsequent video are fine. I had problems with my video that week too--I think it was youtube. That's who I'm blaming anyway. And yes, the sarcastic banter does help in that situation completely! I'm all wacky when I'm being wheeled into surgery! That's funny that you are that way too.

Violet--Nah. I'm actually pretty snarky and sarcastic. I typically chat with folks being goofy and we laugh together! They'd run me out of Mayberry!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

My fave everyday friend is the lady at the starbucks who knows my order before I say it. Maybe she's not really a friend but more like the nurse that doles out my meds as I would not make it through the day without my fix.

Ratty said...

People like this are great. I have a few friends like this on my nature trails. I like talking to the park officials the most.

JODI said...

Juan is a "Fred".

We had a required reading for work before the school year began--The Fred Factor. I had a "Fred" for a mailman, his name was Gary. He would buy band raffle tickets from my girls. He got out of his mail truck to give words of sympathy to a neighbor when there adult child passed away. He always stopped to inquire about our vacations and knew what we all did for a living. He wrote thank you notes for our Christmas gift cards. We left him treats in the mailbox... Then, he retired. And he said good-bye to each and everyone of us on that day. He was irreplacable.

Juan, like Gary, knows the importance of The Fred Factor principal #2--Building Relationships.

Know anyone else who deserves a Fred Award?

Lin said...

DG--Oh, I count that as a pally, DG. Really, does your husband even remember how you like your coffee--I'll bet not.

Ratty--Isn't it funny who we know/but-not-really know? It's just a friendly face in the day to day routine. And it makes it so much nicer. I thought you were going to say your squirrels were your friends! LOL!

Jodi--I like the theory (how was the book? I hate required work reading. Ugh.) because I think it works. Juan is just a nice guy and I think your pally was too. Sad how that has become the exception rather than the rule. I'll tell Juan you said "hi", okay?

Shinade aka Jackie said...

What a simple but wonderful question Lin! Yes, I am very good friends with one of the pharmacist at our local super store.

She is fabulous to me and we always chat. I have friends at the super market. I like to talk too come to think of it I have a great many everyday friends!!

I bake cookies for our meter readers and our postman every year. Wow, I suppose I may even be nice...LOL!!!

I am late as always. I am also sitting here doing this in the middle of thunderstorm.

But, I missed you over the weekend and wanted to drop by and wish you happy week before heading to bed!!

So Happy Week!:-)

JODI said...

Lin, The Fred Factor is an easy read, takes about an hour. Purpose to boast morale.

When you see Juan nex time tell him he has been bestowed with a "Fred Award".

Veronica Lee said...

Yes to everyday friends!! Mine are the condo guards and cleaners and just now, a lady I bought some mooncakes from.

Lin said...

Jackie--Well, I appreciate that you endangered yourself commenting during a thunderstorm! Gees, you are getting pounded, aren't you?! Isn't it funny how we don't "count" these people in our lives as friends, but they are. It's funny how we connect to them, but don't have to go any further than that. I'm glad I'm not the only one who chats with the mailman!

Jodi--I will. And I'm sure he'll think I'm wackier than ever! :)

Veronica--Gotta love Mooncake Lady! I wonder if Bob, up there in the video, can make a verse for Mooncake Lady?? :)

Natural said...

well now you have to read this article.

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1925288,00.html?xid=rss-health

The Importance of Consequential Strangers

Buggys said...

I'm in transition right now. The only everyday friends I have are the folks at my little corner store. They always know when I'm going to need coffee creamer and they order it just for me.
My everyday friends used to be the people at work, now I still talk to them via phone or email but it isn't the same as catching up over donuts on Monday morning.

Aria said...

Totally not fair, gonna have that song in my head for the rest of the day! lol

Lin said...

Natural--Okay, I'm going there now.

Buggys--It's not the same if you know there name or see them on a regular basis. I only know Juan's name because the UPS guy referred to him once. It's a good thing to have these friends though, to spice up the mundane.

Aria--Joe actually asked "who's that?"--can you believe it??! I mean, if you don't know Bob, you don't know nuthin'.